These Walls
by Yourss Truly
Summary: Songfic. I can’t hide behind my insecurities or my fears. If I get hurt, so be it. Sometimes, all you have to do is take a chance... The story of how one Oliver Oken takes a chance and does something he normally wouldn't have done. [Loliver]


**Hello there fellow fanfitcioniers. I just made that word up, unless you couldn't tell. Well, this here is just another songfic. My specialty. I think this one's pretty cute, if I do say so myself. Please, read on to find out for yourself!**

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"So… There was something you wanted to tell me?" she asked again. It was the third time she's said that. I stared blankly as I tried to gather my thoughts. I'm sure I looked like a total idiot, but I didn't know how to begin.

What am I doing here? I thought bitterly. I never should have come down here, I never should have asked her to meet me, I never should have told her I said something important to say to her! I'm so stupid! My nerves and fears are overcoming me right about now. Sure, I've been rejected before, but not by someone this breathtakingly gorgeous. Not by someone so funny, so adorable, so… wonderful… She's perfect, but I don't know if I can face actually doing what I came here to do.

**I can't believe what is in front of me**

**The water's rising up to my knees**

**And I can't figure out**

**How the hell I wound up here**

Yesterday, when I was planning all of this out in my head, it went nothing like this. In my fantasy, I was charming, smooth, and was having a much better hair day. In the real world, however, I'm stuttering, stumbling, and my hair looks like I combed it with a porcupine. Everything around me is swimming, my vision's blurred, I can't focus on what I'm trying to say. My words are coming out choked and rushed, and yet… I can see her. Her hair is blowing softly in the light wind, her face is bright and her smile is flawless.

I must look like a complete dork next to her.

I wonder if anyone else has ever gone through what I'm going through. I wonder if anyone else has ever asked out a girl this beautiful. Well, they must have, because she's had other boyfriends, she's gone on dates. Why is this so difficult for me?

**Everything seemed okay when I started out the other day**

**Then the rain came pouring down**

**And now I'm drowning in my fears**

**And as I watch the setting sun**

**I wonder if I'm the only one**

But I have to do this. If I don't ask her now, someone else will snatch her up, and that's the last thing I want. I know I'm risking the friendship that we have, but… I think it's worth it. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out, and there's nothing I can do about it. If my heart gets broken, my heart gets broken, and I look for someone else to help me mend it.

I need to step out of my safety zone of girls I know would do anything for a date, and ask out someone new. Someone I have loved forever, but nonetheless, someone new.

"Lilly…" I began slowly, surprised at the steadiness of my voice. Maybe all that weak stuff was just in my head?

"Yes, Oliver?" she asked, impatience hinting at the edge of her voice.

"Um… There's something… I… need to say to you…" This will be difficult.

"I'm listening."

"Well… The truth is… I love you." Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. I did it. I finally did it. I told Lilly how I feel about her! I can't believe this. So, I might have mumbled a bit, but at least I said it.

"What did you say? I... couldn't quite hear you," she asked, a look of question on her face.

Was she kidding? Did she just want to hear it again? Or did she really not hear me? Ah, well. I've said it once. I can say it again. "I love you." This time it was much clearer, and I looked her directly in the eyes as I spoke. I went on," Lilly, I've loved you for longer than I can remember. I just… I never thought we would be right together. Watching you go out on different dates with different guys has been torture, but I always through you were happy with the skater guys, and the jocks and the big, beefy guys…"

**Cause everybody tries to put some love on the line**

**And everybody feels a broken heart sometimes**

**And even when I'm scared I have to try to fly**

**Sometimes I fall**

**But I've seen it done before**

**I got to step outside these walls**

"…I never thought you'd want to go out with someone who's been your friend for all these years. I thought that's what we'd always be… friends. The reason I wanted to see you today was because… because I wanted you to know the truth. I didn't plan out any of this. I'm just sort of making it up as I go along. But it's all true!" I added, at her look of confusion. "Everything I'm saying to you is what has been in my heart for so long. It's been dying to get out and proclaim itself to you, Lilly. I was just a little scared of what you would say once you found out that your best friend has had a crush on you since forever.

"So what I'm trying to say is… I love you, Lillian Grace Truscott. And I always have."

She was silent for a moment, then looked up at me, her eyes full of tears. I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing, but her next move was answer enough.

**I've got no master plan to help me out**

**Or make me stand up for**

**All the things I really want**

**You had me to afraid to ask**

**And as I look ahead of me**

**Cry and pray for sanity**

Truthfully, I'm glad I took a chance and did something I wouldn't have normally done. As Lilly kissed me, I stood there, kissing back, of course, but thinking as well. Now that I made one big step towards my goals, I want to make another, and another. I want to take giant leaps of faith that could lead me off a cliff or into the arms of the one I love.

I can't hide behind my insecurities or my fears. I have to put myself out in the open for everyone to see. If I get hurt, so be it. But getting hurt is a small price to pay for what comes of being bold.

Sometimes, all you have to do is take a chance.

**These walls can't be my haven**

**These walls can't keep me safe here**

**Now I guess I got to let them down**

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**Good? Bad? What did you think? I'd love to find out. But how will we make that happen? Gee, i don't know! Maybe, in the future, they'll invent some sort of way for people to review for other people's stories! How cool would that be? Oh, well. Untill then, i suppose. **

**x3 dee. **


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